Low income husband - a reason for divorce?
To begin with, let's define what kind of income we will consider low, because everything in this world is relative. My friend married the owner of a construction company. And when I was going to marry an “ordinary guy,” she sincerely asked: “Well, is he promising?” Well, at least 500 thousand earns? ”For her, a salary of less than half a million rubles is not a salary at all. My cousin lives in a small provincial town. And her husband, in her opinion, "earns very well - 25 thousand rubles." For them - "big money"! Therefore, if you do not rest every year in the Maldives and do not wander for a weekend in Paris, this does not mean that your man can not provide for a family. Let's not go to extremes. Maybe it is you who spend a lot on business? But if you live half starvingly, but at the same time your faithful lying on the couch and he is satisfied with everything - this is a problem. And the income of such a spouse can be called low.
Why does this happen? Laziness? But laziness is a natural condition for a person.A person is lazy to save energy, so it is inherent in nature. We are all lazy. Another thing is character. There are men without the “entrepreneurial spirit”, and that's it. Psychologists say that the desire and ability to work and earn, as a rule, is weakly expressed in men who were brought up by powerful women. If a mother suppresses and humiliates his father in front of his son, then the boy is unlikely to grow up to be a leader, and already at a subconscious level he will never feel himself the breadwinner in the family. The same can be said about the influence of the wife on her husband.
The stronger and more independent the spouse is, the less her husband will earn. The more a woman will be occupied by home and children, the more comfortable the family nest will be, the more a man will earn. This is how human instincts work.
And yes, many of us for the sake of a penny in the general family budget begin to save on themselves, refuse to buy a new handbag, shoes, from going to a good beauty salon, just to postpone a vacation. You can not do this. Psychologists say - this is the easiest way to "fall" in the eyes of men. On a woman who can save on themselves, do not want to earn.
In which case the low income of the husband can be a reason for divorce? According to psychologists, only one thing: if a man categorically does not want to take on financial responsibility and maintenance of the family together with household chores and raising children completely shifts the shoulders of a woman. And the older the untalented, the more difficult it will be to change something. If a man earns little, but at the same time he is actively engaged in household chores and spends a lot of time with children, that is another matter. Perhaps he simply lacks confidence in himself professionally. This situation can be resolved.
So, how to make a man earn more? Summarize.
The first. Arrange a stressful situation. That is, stop pulling everything on your shoulders and live only on your husband's money. Starve up a week or two - you see, something will change.
The second. Let the purchase of products and trips to parents' meetings (and there always collect money) will be the prerogative of the spouse. He will clearly see that living on his salary at such prices is unrealistic. He himself will plan all the important purchases and, accordingly, will try to earn as much as possible.
If you do not have children yet, give birth (of course, if the future dad is not a gigolo and a finished lazy person). The birth of children is the strongest motivator for making money.
Do more home work. Maintain comfort. Cook nicely, invent interesting interior solutions. Arrange your life in such a way that even the guests do not want to leave you. In such a house a man will certainly try to bring more money.
Take care of yourself! The better a woman looks, the stronger the man’s desire to spend money on her.
Praise your spouse! Constantly and as much as possible. Even for the little things. This will give him confidence.
Remember, in the family he is the head, not you. Only a leader and authority can fully support a family. He must feel so. And that is your task.
And do not flirt. Do you want him to earn a lot, but at the same time spent time with his family and engaged in raising children? At the same time to be young and beautiful? It does not happen. Look at life soberly. Or a family idyll, but without the Maldives and expensive cars, or evenings alone and the absence of her husband at home, even on weekends, but with a mountain of diamond rings and her own yacht.And remember, there will always be a dozen or even a hundred young hunters for a rich man. On the heels will go. Do not chase. In general, everything should be in moderation. And your desires too.
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